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[ - ] Anyone here experience heart palpitations? Do I need to be worried? My heart has been fluttering for the past few weeks. I stopped caffeine today, hoping that would stop the palpitations, but I'm still feeling them about twice per minute. I'm 43, 165 lbs. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:31 PM Flag
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This is something you need a professional evaluation for. You probably don't need to be worried about dying or anything, but you should have yourself worked up just in case. There are some things you don't mess around with, and the stuff your heart does is one of them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:35 PM Flag
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The weight is meaningless without the height. But it's probably nothing. I get them when I have lots of stress. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:35 PM Flag
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Dehydration can cause this. I also have a benign racing heart so I take a beta blocker. Anemia can cause a heat issue. Mine was racing when I had bad anemia. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:38 PM Flag
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Peri [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:38 PM Flag
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This happened to me. Very uncomfortable and frightening. Cardiologist did run a bunch of tests to rule out anything more serious but turned out to be attributed to elevated thyroid levels. I also think anxiety was a factor. It stopped on it's own. I cut out caffeine after that and have tried to keep my weight down and have monitored my thyroid but I thankfully don't have a permanent thyroid condition. Definitely go to the doctor. There are medications that can make it go away and treatments if it is an arrhythmia or chronic thyroid disease. But you also need peace of mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:39 PM Flag
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I went to a cardiologist about this. Turned out to be nothing. But go if it would reassure you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Can I post happy news? Or not after 5? DS just came over for dinner (he's 23) and told me what a great mom I was. OK maybe he was lying but it definitely made my day. Happy vent over. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:15 PM Flag
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Good. Enjoy your evening with him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:19 PM Flag
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Thx! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:39 PM Flag
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When my son lingers for more than a few minutes talking to me I usually ask him if he just needs money in his bank account. 90% of the time he needs money, 10% of the time he's somehow enhanced. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:19 PM Flag
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But also, I am a great mom and you probably are, too :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:19 PM Flag
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Aw thanks! I initiated the divorce so always feel guilty but he tells me I'm a good role model. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:40 PM Flag
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That's great! Have a wonderful evening with him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:26 PM Flag
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:) This was after many rocky teen years, so I am cherishing it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:40 PM Flag
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My son is same age. We do this thing where whenever one of us recommends that the other one watch a TV show, that person also gets to choose a show, then we commit to sitting on the couch watching both. We each get to choose which episode in the series we want, unless the other person wants to start at S1 Ep1. It ends up in a nice hour or so of us just hanging out together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:26 PM Flag
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I love that -- thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Hahaha... the taxes are coming 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:07 PM Flag
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What do you mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:09 PM Flag
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We are getting the cheat-in-chief’s NY returns [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:11 PM Flag
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I doubt it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:15 PM Flag
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Well... tell the courts that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:24 PM Flag
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Let us do wait and see. I am highly doubtful it will come to pass. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Derm moms or moms with good skin (who are not 30 yrs old): Been getting facials done by the same person for 10+ years (I'm 43) and feel like I am maybe getting hosed on products. I spend *a lot* on eye creams, face creams, etc. (Like probably $800+ total when I combine the stuff I buy for day and night.) Its kind of crept up over the years, adding a product here and a product there. What do you all use for eye creams, face creams, etc? I don't mind spending $$ if it's going to make a difference, but I feel like it's OTT now. 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:04 PM Flag
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Every expert who has ever done a documentary/expose on this has said OTC topical creams don't do anything nor do facials. Stop buying any of it. Facials are to feel good. That's all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:07 PM Flag
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OP: Really? I know that there's no magic bullet, but I would imagine that clean, moisturized skin with the dead stuff on top removed looks better than skin where that has not been done... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:13 PM Flag
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You can do that by yourself with an exfoliating wash. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:22 PM Flag
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Dead stuff, lol. It's there to protect your skin. You don't need to remove it. It's your face. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:29 PM Flag
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Yes. Every time. There is a small % of people who have beautiful skin no matter what. Like 5%. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:34 PM Flag
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They also get rid of blackheads if that's an issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:14 PM Flag
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Every single expert huh? This is not true. Cleaning out your pores and things like microdermabrasion, photofacials etc. help your skin immensely. A fun strawberry and cucumber facial not so much (although it doesn’t hurt). Also using crap on your skin will show. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:28 PM Flag
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I doubt it. I have had microdermabrasion. Totally worthless. I think everything out there is the same except for acid peels. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:32 PM Flag
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Yes, every single expert who is not financially biased. Cleaning out your pores (with soap) is beneficial. Nothing else OTC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:38 PM Flag
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This!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:41 PM Flag
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they're all crap. you're born with good skin. otherwise, retin-a, vitamin c serum and sunscreen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:11 PM Flag
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By your age, you should be able to look around and see that it's genetic. Especially at 43, everybody pretty much looks the same. People who wear sunscreen religiously look the same as those who tanned in the sun, especially with make-up on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:11 PM Flag
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Disagree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:23 PM Flag
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No way. Not at all true. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:23 PM Flag
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You either live in a really strange place or are seriously delusional. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:35 PM Flag
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True. Some people look more pale than others, but no one has beautiful, glowing, measurably amazing skin. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:41 PM Flag
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Older mom here with good skin (so they tell me). I get facials purely for the relaxation (and it does temporarily make my big pores look smaller). Rest, hydration, and a basic moisturizer (like Cetaphil) are all you need. Plus of course sunscreen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:12 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks. This is all convincing me that I need to seriously pare down what I buy from her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:16 PM Flag
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You do need a good cleanser, moisturizer and retinol serum. But good ones. Eye cream is nice too though. Not sure what else you buy. $800? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:36 PM Flag
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same, it's genetics. I use a charcoal soap from Japan, Trader Joe's moisturizer and a mineral sunscreen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:26 PM Flag
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48 here. I’ve had chemical peels and microdermabrasion. I’ve found the power peel 3step mask from ole Hendrickson and I thought the results were better than any of the professional stuff I had done. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:21 PM Flag
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microdermabrasion is crap. but it's better than chem peels? that's very interesting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:26 PM Flag
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oh, i see. it's a glycolic peel. yes, they are supposed to be good. i am surprised it is better than prof peels. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:28 PM Flag
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I honestly use only Neutrogena face lotion with spf 15. I barely wash my face. I wear minimal makeup other than coverup for eye circles. I'm 55. Maybe I have genetically great skin but I never need anything else. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:29 PM Flag
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Lots of water, lots of sleep, sunscreen, clean face at night religiously. Rest are genes. Also if you skin was oilier when you were young, you are likely to have less wrinkles when older/have them later. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:34 PM Flag
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It really depends on your natural skin. If you have problem skin of any type then you have to be aggressive and stay on top of it for good results. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:38 PM Flag
[ - ] I am extremely close with my grandma, who is turning 95 this summer. She is in good health, all things considered, and her mind is still sharp as a tack. Looking for ideas for a special birthday gift. I live across the country, and am flying in for the small (family only) party we are throwing, but want to get a gift as well. She is an avid reader - we bought her an iPad a few years ago and she has enjoyed reading books on there (esp to make the font bigger). She doesn't drive any more but has someone who takes her around for errands a couple of times a week. Any ideas? She doesn't have a ton of disposable income and is NOT someone who "has everything".... but I just cannot think of anything special to mark the big day of this seriously amazing woman. (I *am* going to write her a card telling her how special I think she is.... and I tell her all the time anyway.) 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:00 PM Flag
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Buy her a plant. If it survives her, you can plant it at your place. You can even ask her to talk to it, so it'll have her love in it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:05 PM Flag
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OP: I like this idea (although I don't know if I really would be able to get the plant cross country later on). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:07 PM Flag
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Does she have wifi? My dad watches netflix on his ipad. You could get her a gift card for it and set it up for her while you are there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:08 PM Flag
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OP: she does have Wifi. She loves old movies (and some more recentness - she went through a phase of watching Pretty Woman weekly haha). I like the Netflix idea - a bit worried it might be complicated for her to figure out... she is not great with tech (the iPad took a while) but I think she could figure it out. TY! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:11 PM Flag
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You can set it up for her while you are visiting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:14 PM Flag
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We got my fil an Alexa and he loves it. Plays music on it, asks her questions, has her remind him of his appointments etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:17 PM Flag
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OP: I also forgot to mention - she collects "hearts" - heart shaped paperweights, frames, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:08 PM Flag
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95 is too old to be adding to a collection. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:25 PM Flag
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What about making a cook book with all her recipes that is interspersed with favorite memories and photos that go with each dish.you can make copies of it for all of her grandchildren. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:20 PM Flag
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OP: OMG I love this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:21 PM Flag
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Take her somewhere special for the day. She doesn't need more stuff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:25 PM Flag
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magazine subscription? Puzzle magazine? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:31 PM Flag
[ - ] Piano or violin? Dd playing piano for 3 yrs now, but wants to switch. I’m all for it - allows for group activity but afraid she wants to give up piano because it’s getting more challenging. Thoughts? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:49 PM Flag
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Violin is more challenging than piano. I would let her try a few violin lessons before giving up piano [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:54 PM Flag
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let her try the violin. If she loves music then have her keep doing piano until her violin playing catches up, if she doesn't love music, it is okay to let her switch and drop piano. I would follow her lead on this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:11 PM Flag
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i played violin from 3rd to 9th grade and piano from 1st grade and into college (went for performance but switched majors). i would say piano is more difficult but more rewarding. many more solo pieces and, quite frankly, i like the sound of a solo piano vs. solo violin (i also think violin is more "painful" to listen to when you are learning). maybe have her stick with both then decide which she likes better? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:04 PM Flag
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I wish, but time just won’t allow for it. How easy would it be to switch back after a year? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:09 PM Flag
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It is fine. or she may switch to another instrument and that is okay too. If she is open to it, ds started the cello this year and it sounds really good. Love the cello! But if her heart is set on violin then let her change. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:13 PM Flag
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Thank you. I know deep inside I’m okay with it but have some sense of not wanting to lose what has already been invested. But if her heart is not with it, then why keep going [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:19 PM Flag
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Love cello, but not practical to carry around city [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:20 PM Flag
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Viola, not violin. Less competitive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:16 PM Flag
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No one is noticing this but you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:32 PM Flag
[ - ] If ER MD Mom from yesterday happens to be on-I wanted to update that DH with the intense pain on right side saw another MD yesterday and he diagnosed pulled muscles in his ribs (prob. from working out). I had convinced myself it was something much worse so I am beyond relieved...anyway thank you for your helpful info yesterday I really appreciated it. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:42 PM Flag
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Oh I am so glad to hear! I happen to be on- I’m the one with the shy four year old below, haha. Glad all is looking benign. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:53 PM Flag
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Thanks...they initially thought appendix which took him to ER and a very stressful day. Had no idea pulled muscles in the ribs could hurt so much! Don't worry about your dd, mine was the same and after a year she was able to join activities. GL! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:58 PM Flag
[ - ] 4 yo DD has been begging to do ballet. I got her in a little girls class with one of her friends. She’s so painfully shy that she refused to participate unless I was by her side the whole class (by which I mean twirling around and being a butterfly w the other kids). If I sat with the other moms, she came over by me and just cried. Anyone BTDT? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:50 PM Flag
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What if you left? And she couldn't see you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:55 PM Flag
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This would be ideal- will have to ask if the teacher doesn’t mind dealing with a few intense moments of tears. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:04 PM Flag
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4 is a little old to “just leave”... no? Like you’re trying to trick her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:51 PM Flag
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More like, it’s class time. I’m walking down the street to pick up your brother from school and we will return in a short while. The teacher actually said the classes go more smoothly without parents around. Just don’t see it happening smoothly for us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:54 PM Flag
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np Mine took classes at the Y from age three, and other than the first class of each session parents are prohibited. Much better. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:17 PM Flag
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The moms should drop off at that age. Why are you all hanging around? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:56 PM Flag
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It’s actually the youngest class offered. Was first class for all. I don’t think it’s the plan for all classes in future [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:58 PM Flag
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Because her child is 4 and wasn't ready. It's no biggie. She will become more confident with separating as she gets older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:11 PM Flag
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Yes. 20 years ago I was the mom in the dead of winter with my leggings getting wet at the side of the indoor pool because 4 yo dd wouldn’t swim unless she could also touch me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:57 PM Flag
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ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:04 PM Flag
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I spend years with my shy child "watching" the classes we paid for. He got better in K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:04 PM Flag
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YES, my son was just like this until about 4.5. I didn't push him and now he happily does all kinds of independent classes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:10 PM Flag
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My dd is older now but I wish I encouraged her more to do things herself. It gives them confidence that my DD never had a chance to develop early on. I would talk with the teacher to let her know. Is it possible for someone else to drop her off? Maybe her friends mom could take them together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:35 PM Flag
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aww that takes me back!! Mine did the EXACT same thing at 4, begged to go then wouldn't participate (though I was no twirler myself). Well guess what, next week she is the lead in her high school's musical. Whatever your dd's path with dance or performing or whatever, let her find her way. When you think about it 4 is SO LITTLE. Maybe she just wants to watch awhile and that's okay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:36 PM Flag
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Yes-we tried ballet but caregivers were not allowed in the room so it didn't work. Fast forward 5 years and she LOVES dance! So don't worry and just give it another try when she's a bit older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:43 PM Flag
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4 is so little! Just be patient. She will get braver. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:45 PM Flag
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That's fine. I think she's brave. She's not letting her fear get in the way of trying something! Be proud of her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:50 PM Flag
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Thanks all! V helpful!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:55 PM Flag
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have nanny drop her off. less drama than with parents. if no nanny, what also works for us is to do a brief recap right before (as in outside the door right before you walk in, find a quiet spot where she won't be distracted). "We will go in and you will get a chance to dance/learn (whatever else you want to mention) with your new friends. I will sit on the side with mommies and watch you but I can't be with you. When you finish, you will come over and we will go home"/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Just heard a phone call on a radio advice show, and the caller thinks masturbation is an actual sin. Forgot there are people like that in the world. She knows her 17-year-old son is doing it and wants to talk to him and suggest better "coping mechanisms." Creepy. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:41 PM Flag
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Dr Laura show? I am my kid’s mom .. lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:43 PM Flag
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Yes! Are you listening? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:53 PM Flag
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No but I listened to her years ago on & off. Sounds like her show. I wonder what her ds is up to now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:59 PM Flag
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He’s out of the army and married. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:17 PM Flag
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She’s such a terrible person. Perfect example of people working through serious mother issues talking to that woman. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:54 PM Flag
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Oh I was fully taught that as a child (Catholic) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:51 PM Flag
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Well yeah, but don't we all know better now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:53 PM Flag
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Yeah but hell of a message for a formative mind [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:55 PM Flag
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My husband is an actor and used to get paid to call in to radio shows and play characters. He got a lot of work because he has a southern accent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:25 PM Flag
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ha ha!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:27 PM Flag
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This is a thing?? I feel so naive!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:29 PM Flag
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I feel dumb. We all really should have suspected that this was happening. Why wouldn't it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:57 PM Flag
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Ooooh, the stirrings, time for a pill [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:40 PM Flag
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HM - the so-called Sin of Onan has caused so much unhappiness... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:50 PM Flag
[ - ] Is there a Psychic Mom on here now? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:39 PM Flag
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By definition, no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:48 PM Flag
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Is there a Gullible Mom on here now? Yes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:48 PM Flag
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Please, please don't do this to yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:04 PM Flag
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Foolish Mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:05 PM Flag
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Only Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:05 PM Flag
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I am the great and powerful Oz. Ask me anything, but you may only get a trinket. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:15 PM Flag
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It cracks me up how vehemently people oppose the psychic and tarot moms here. No one takes them seriously except those people who insist on tearing them down. However I also suspect that at least 4 of the six rebukes are from the same np with a chip on her shoulder. She's probably been conned in the past. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:22 PM Flag
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Aww, look who just showed up, another actor trying to make a buck on gullible people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:26 PM Flag
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? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:47 PM Flag
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So...how do "psychic moms" make money on UB? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:56 PM Flag
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Hey there again Literal Mom, you're busy today. Anyway, the real issue is that we have supposed genius posters on here with over the top genius kids bound for Harvard and they are still looking for Rasputin. Think about it. Use your TT education and pine on that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:31 PM Flag
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fail... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:37 PM Flag
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A couple of them are pretty good. The original psychic mom was kind of amazing. If it's free, why not take their reading? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:58 PM Flag
[ - ] Im prepared to be flamed but gere it goes. Im jealous when i hear someones husband died. Dh left me a year ago and nobidu sent me a gift card or comes to check up on me or gives a shit that im alone on the holidays 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:36 PM Flag
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That suck. I’m sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:38 PM Flag
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Dead people don’t make support payments, they’re worth more alive [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:41 PM Flag
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Nope soon to be ec dh has 1.5 life insurance. Support will total less than half a million over ten years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:47 PM Flag
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You’re not getting the life insurance so that doesn’t matter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:48 PM Flag
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Well that is part of the jealousy of the widows [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:49 PM Flag
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And you will get zero if he dies. Am I missing something? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:48 PM Flag
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Yes, first of all as far as i know i am still the beneficiary. Second of all not talking about him dying now.talking about if he had died instead if leaving me. You sound like my ex. He spies on me here sometimes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:51 PM Flag
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Yes, it’s me your ex. Here on UB, spying on you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:55 PM Flag
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What? My Dh is worth more dead than alive in terms of $. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:34 PM Flag
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Why are people supposed to send you gift cards in this scenario [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:53 PM Flag
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Welk why are you sending one to the widow? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:58 PM Flag
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Dead people and stuff. Not "I can't live with this jerk." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:23 PM Flag
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She got dumped. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:27 PM Flag
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I get that. I'm sorry you feel lonely. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:50 PM Flag
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My husband cheated on me. I think about leaving him. Why are you alone? Do you not want to date or is it very hard? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:00 PM Flag
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I kind of understand what you're saying. I feel that way sometimes too, but more because I wish dh would just disappear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:28 PM Flag
[ - ] My father is in hospice and we are all grieving. My sister is losing it and attacking me and brother. She also did this when our mother died, screaming awful things at us. I know she is hurting but she is a 50 year old woman. Am I expected to take this from her again? I can't process my own feelings about my father dying because of her drama. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:29 PM Flag
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Walk away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:32 PM Flag
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Well, you won’t have to deal with her again soon after this. Just try to get through it. I’m sorry about your dad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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I’m sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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Everyone grieves in different ways. Try to create some space. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:39 PM Flag
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I'm sorry, OP. My sister did this. It was awful. Just try and deal w her as little as possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:29 PM Flag
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Mine did this too. Nuts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:41 PM Flag
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Sorry about your dad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:42 PM Flag
[ - ] Name poll: obetta 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:23 PM Flag
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Puts me in mind of Odetta, the antagonist in Stephen King's The Dark Tower. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:25 PM Flag
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Also the incredibly famous 20th-century soul singer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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np--Odetta was an incredibly soulful folk singer who accompanied herself on guitar: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glr_sV9s1FM [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:58 PM Flag
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NP I known Odette. I like the name. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:01 PM Flag
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ugh I know AN Odette. I lost my space and the a! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:01 PM Flag
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As in Odette and Odile, the white and black swans in Swan Lake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:42 PM Flag
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Reminds me of the SNL skit on Alexa for old people - they called it everything but Alexa: Odessa! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:26 PM Flag
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LOL my kids loved that skit, tried to change Alexa's name to one of those! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:36 PM Flag
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Old fashioned name. I like it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:58 PM Flag
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It is close to obese so I fear teasing or a sub,I I also negative reaction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:01 PM Flag
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Subliminal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:01 PM Flag
[ - ] DD has long beautiful hair with wisps around her face that come loose from her ponytail. She wants to get some cream or gel to keep them out of her face - I'm clueless. What would you suggest? i don't want her plastering the hair around her face back. She's 13 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 05.22.19, 09:19 PM Flag
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this is what barrettes were made for [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:22 PM Flag
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She doesn't like barrettes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:23 PM Flag
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then maybe a headband. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:33 PM Flag
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Doesn't like those either [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:33 PM Flag
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Bobbi pin [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:40 PM Flag
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attagirl! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:01 PM Flag
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Go to a Japanese salon. They have great hair “wax” or “putty.” Lots of different consistencies for different type of hair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:24 PM Flag
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I'm just worried it will look weird - beautiful thick hair and then the fronts plastered to her head. Does it look natural? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:25 PM Flag
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You sound way too invested in DD’s hair gel. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:30 PM Flag
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She is 13. If she has not shaved half of it off and dyed it green, i cant even imagine caring. The plastered back thing is a style a lot of teens wear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:31 PM Flag
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Okay, didn't know, thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:33 PM Flag
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It's horrendous, though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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Teens dont care about your old person opinion. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:52 PM Flag
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Most teens don't think it's cute, either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:22 PM Flag
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Sahm? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:32 PM Flag
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Nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:33 PM Flag
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Neglectful mom? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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Not neglectful .. but a 13 wanting hair cream is a blessing when you think of what a13 yo can get into. I can’t imagine giving it enough concern to post about it. I would let her pick & try some gels. Good for her development... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:41 PM Flag
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Same flyaway wisps here. So I was messing around trying out the CGM (curly girl method) where instead of brushing after washing, I used a wide tooth comb and let it air dry to find its natural texture. While it was wet I used fingers to run clear sculpting gel through it. Later on during the day even when I figured out my hair really was not going to be curly (just wavy), I took a brush to it anyway. The gel actually gave it a really nice full consistency and I was able to pull it back into a very clean ponytail. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:45 PM Flag
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I’m not a haircare maven and I’m not at home now but I think it’s Paul Mitchell and I want to say it might be sculpting lotion and not gel. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:47 PM Flag
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why not some light hairspray [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:00 PM Flag
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Hairspray - I'm serious. I have long hair that ALWAYS has wisps from my ponytails or messy buns. A light hold hairspray is your friend. I put my hair up and lightly spray the front then sort of use my hairs to smooth those wisps back, don't press too hard on the hair, just sort of glide your hand over. Hair stays neat all day with no plastering look or barrettes/headbands needed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:16 PM Flag
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use my *hands* not hairs - sorry, typing too fast! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:16 PM Flag
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Get her a light hold gel; she'll be fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:21 PM Flag
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Duane Reade and Rite Aid, the People's pharmacies, have an aisle devoted to this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:24 PM Flag
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Use a little gel. That's what I put on my kids hair for making ballet buns. You have to experiment sometimes. Ask at a hair salon--they sold me some great stuff over the years. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:51 PM Flag
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L'oreal super hold gel [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Sigh - I have come to accept the fact that I am a woman-child, and I can't help it. Unfortunately, it makes me the black sheep of the highly independent, high-achieving family I am a part of. Would I annoy you? examples being, I have anxiety about almost everything, I'm not handy, scared to travel, can barely drive, terrible cook, etc. And no, I was not spoiled growing up - it's my personal weakness. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:13 PM Flag
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^And no I'm not married, no kids. I come here to learn. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:14 PM Flag
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You can help it, you choose not to. It's hard to take responsibility for yourself, and if you have the option of not doing so, you don't try. Take one step at a time. Book a trip. Make dinner for your family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:19 PM Flag
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No, I am a type B absent minded professor type who is clumsy on top of it all. I'm even annoying now! Thanks for the faith though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:21 PM Flag
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You clearly don't know anything about anxiety. You can't "choose" to ignore it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:36 PM Flag
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We are little girls inside. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:19 PM Flag
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Vomit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:22 PM Flag
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No seriously though, are you really a different person on the inside? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:29 PM Flag
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I'm a woman teenager, it happens. You would annoy me though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:23 PM Flag
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I prepare myself for mockery: Read about Eleanor Roosevelt. Ignored by her mother, neglected by her father, married and then her husband repeatedly cheated on her. She wrote: You must do the thing you think you cannot do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:32 PM Flag
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OP: You write "I can't help it." Well, there you go. You've decided that this is a comfortable spot for you and you won't even try. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:34 PM Flag
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Just don't burden other people with your weaknesses. Other than that, they shouldn't much care. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:36 PM Flag
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I am you!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:30 PM Flag
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terrible cook? Not handy? If you wanted to, you could learn this stuff. You are just making excuses. " that's just how I am". You should get on top of this for your own sake, and also because you are no doubt annoying other people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:55 PM Flag
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Yes you would annoy me to no end. You remind me of my SIL actually. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:05 PM Flag
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Be careful with who you marry. You don’t want to marry a daddy type just so you don’t have to grow up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:09 PM Flag
[ - ] Dh is obsessed with going to electronic music festivals with his friends. What happens at them? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:11 PM Flag
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Drugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:18 PM Flag
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He doesn’t do drugs.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:20 PM Flag
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At the very least he’s drinking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:35 PM Flag
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Oh. Maybe that, he starts fights when I say he shouldn’t go as often. It’s a few a month. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:42 PM Flag
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How old? Sounds like midlife crisis. Mine lost 40lbs, bought all new clothes and went to Nickelback and Kid Rock concerts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:50 PM Flag
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35. He spends all his free time at these festivals. Punches the wall when I questioned him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:16 PM Flag
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Ok well good luck sorry about your walls. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:58 PM Flag
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Time to leave the guy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:18 PM Flag
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lol. Sure [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:52 PM Flag
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easy sex [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Dd age 10 has adhd and has had a hard time keeping friends. She’s cute and outgoing so making the friends is easy but over time her energy and immaturity wear people down so friends don’t stick. She is trying so hard to make friends and is running out of new kids at school to try to befriend. I think this will work itself out within a few years but now it’s hard. Can anyone give me some tough but not mean words to help me get over myself and my disappointment with some of the friends she is trying with (not the kids I would have hoped but that is me being a snobby bitch). I am so proud of my kid for continuing to try and not proud of myself for not embracing all the kids she is trying with. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 08:59 PM Flag
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A kid that is willing to befriend your kid and look past some of her quirks to get to know her is a good friend to have, and might prove to be a stronger lifelong friend. Also, they're 10. You don't know which ones are going to turn out to be good influences, good friends, or generally winners long term. It sounds like your kid is resilient and open to putting herself out there, which is great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:03 PM Flag
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Totally agree thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:06 PM Flag
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I have the same problem with 12yo adhd ds. I feel your pain. DS is actually having a harder time now than he was at 10 (not meant to discourage you, just our particular case). On the bright side, ds is a pretty happy guy and I just hang out with him more and we have a great time. I've also been doing some social skills work with him (from workbooks you can get on amazon) and it makes him feel better. It's gotten better this year as the year went on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:06 PM Flag
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Can you recommend some workbooks? -np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:16 PM Flag
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»
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Thank you!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:27 PM Flag
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Poster below: why more difficult? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:28 PM Flag
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+1. Harder this year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:39 PM Flag
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FWIW- we are in a similar position. My DS is 10 and has ADHD but his immaturity and energy get on kids' nerves, so he had no friends. It's heartbreaking. Hang in there! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:10 PM Flag
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Social skills classes with therapists. Teach empathy and have her see how her actions/behaviors can make others shun her or not likely to invite her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:19 PM Flag
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*also I think theater is a place these behaviors can be shaped and celebrated. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:20 PM Flag
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np: it's not as if adhd kids have no empathy. they are usually very kind actually. they are just impulsive and can't control their exuberant behavior. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:22 PM Flag
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Op yep this is my kid [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:24 PM Flag
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Poster above: yep, mine too. Can't control *any* behavior, actually. Which is the problem. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:46 PM Flag
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First, it's a tough situation and can feel isolating, especially if you found friends through DD's school or parents of her friends. In any case, that changes over time anyways. I would say it might help for you to focus on your own relationships and friendships so you don't feel as much disappointment over DD's friend choices. I'm not trying to be mean, but friendships fall apart even when ADHD isn't in the picture. Also, she has to figure out whether she needs a few good reliable friends or likes the feeling of belonging to a group, even if she has a lot of clashes and shallow relationships in the latter. There are different approaches to each. Last, I think anyone, especially people with ADHD, thrive when they find a sense of purpose and focus, such as a talent to cultivate, a hobby, a sport. Let her focus on that and find people who also share her interest and passion. It's helpful to have multiple social groups, at school, ECs, in the neighborhood, so she can always move away from drama rather than fixate and get trapped in it. This may not be a symptom now, but it is very common. FWIW I met someone in my field who was passionate and creative, and he had a certain spark to him. I saw him in his element, and we married despite his severe disabilities. Several friends also have spouses and kids with ADHD, and many adults we know are very successful. I would treat it like any other disability, so accommodate it, acknowledge that it is hard on her and the family, plan to guide her and see her grow from it, focus on the positive, don't blame the world and others for a difficult situation, and know that she can learn how to manage ADHD's advantageous elements also. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:14 PM Flag
[ - ] OMG what's wrong with me. Working out wipes me out so much. Like for the rest of the day. Am I just out of shape or what? 50yo, 5'8", 175 lbs. I've always exercised but I guess I slowed down quite a bit in the last two years. How am I supposed to keep going if I'm completely wiped out for the rest of the day after an hour of exercise? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 08:59 PM Flag
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My energy level also dropped off a cliff at 50 so frustrating. Would higher intensity for shorter amount of time help? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:01 PM Flag
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Cut back to 30 minutes and work your way up to an hour? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:02 PM Flag
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An hour sounds like a long work out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:03 PM Flag
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could be sugar dips. are you eating lots of refined carbs? that will zap your energy on the downcycle. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:04 PM Flag
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Are you eating/drinking properly to support your workouts? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:06 PM Flag
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OP: see below...I thought so! Maybe I should drink more water? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:12 PM Flag
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OP: so today I did tennis for an hour in the morning and i biked there and back, all on an empty stomach because i don't eat bfst as part of my diet. but i don't think it's the lack of food, because i'm ok until after lunch and then in the afternoon i'm totally sore and wiped out. ugh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:08 PM Flag
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You are overdoing it and eat breakfast. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:12 PM Flag
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I'm trying to lose weight tho....really want to get to 150 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:13 PM Flag
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Studies show people who eat breakfast are thinner. Skip lunch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:15 PM Flag
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Studies show people who eat breakfast are thinner. Skip lunch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:15 PM Flag
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NP I do, but I have an eating disorder. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:21 PM Flag
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actually, recent studies show that is not the case and people actually seem to lose more weight by skipping it if they don't normally eat breakfast. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:09 PM Flag
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Yes, you are out of shape. And overweight. Get a backpack, fill it with 35 pounds of books, and carry it around for a few days. That is what your body deals with every day. Increase the intensity of your workouts and improve your diet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 09:41 PM Flag
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No, that's 70 extra pounds. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:26 PM Flag
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If you keep at it eventually it becomes really energizing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:17 PM Flag
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You may be slightly anemic. I was severely anemic and couldn't get a workout that didn't wipe me out. Later doctor said that red blood cells that are slightly damaged or new (from anemia your body is fighting to constantly produce more) don't hold the oxygen in the blood as well You can't really workout that well. He actually told me to take 1/2 a year off and wait. It worked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 10:53 PM Flag
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Maybe you're overweight? I'm 49-1/2 and I work out most days for an hour and it doesn't wipe me out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:03 PM Flag
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56 year old runner here. You need to refuel with protein and some fat within 30 minutes of stopping. Think whole wheat toast with peanut butter or avocado. When I was training for the marathon and doing 9 miles before work, you could have knocked me over with a feather. Keep up the exercise! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.19, 11:14 PM Flag
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